Child of Dreams

"Save your tears 'cause I'll come back."  I could hear that you whispered as you walked through that door,
But still I swore To hide the pain, While I turned back the pages.
                                                                                                                            1000 Words by Koda Kumi

Chapter 12

Morning dawned bright and clear. The smell of blooming things filled the air, accentuating the abundance of life around them. Jonathan could find little joy in it though. That T’Pol had seen Meyah was of little comfort to him, for he didn’t have the child with him. What was the purpose of these dreams? These illusions? Where were his children? What were they? He took the bowl of fruit T’Pol passed him, and ate it automatically. There was no thought, no enjoyment as he toyed with his thoughts.

“Jonathan?” She waited until he looked at her to continue. “I think we should check the beach again this morning. There may be something we missed last night.”

He wanted to ask her why they should bother. He wanted to rant and rave at the injustice of it all. He wanted to curl up and cry. Instead, he asked. “Aren’t we supposed to meet with some people from the ministry this morning?”

“Yes. The ministry is sending several scholars to help us. They are going to fill us in on the history of Hahnala. They will not be here for several hours. We have enough time to search the beach if you want.”

“If I want… what a laugh.” He set his bowl aside and stood, walking toward the cliffs. “What I want… what I want is to have you and my children in my arms. I want my memory and my life whole once more.” He spun suddenly, flinging his arms out. “I want free of this confusion. I want the truth and I want to understand.” His eyes met hers, and his hands dropped to his sides. His voice dropped to a whisper. “I don’t think that’s too much to ask, do you?”

T’Pol stood, and walked to him. “No.”

He moved then, reaching for her, pulling her into his arms, drawing her close. “I love you so much. Don’t leave me too.”

Her arms curled around him, holding him tight. “As long as it is within my power, I will stay by your side.”

He held her for a long moment, drawing comfort from her as he had over the last several days. His voice was muffled against her shoulder as he spoke, but he wasn’t willing to let her go. “I was angry with her last night. We had been searching so hard for her, for all of them, and then, when it was the two of us, and just the two of us, she was there. Do you think that’s why she was there? Because I forgot about her, about them for just a few moments? Did I just imagine her?”

“We both saw her, Jonathan, and we both tried to get to her.” She pulled back and looked into his eyes, her hands cupping his cheeks. “I think she is tied to you, to your emotion. The beach was a good place for all of you. I think she felt your joy, your happiness, and was drawn to it. I don’t begin to understand any of it, but perhaps your emotion called her from whatever place she dwelled and she just couldn’t stay.”

“Do you think she’s real?”

“As I said before, she is real to you. That is all that really matters. But I have seen her now too, so she exists for me as well. We will keep searching, keep learning, until we find her.”

“Thank you.” He drew her close once more, and just held her.