He had no sense of how long he laid in the shower. The cold water was having little effect on the problem and despite the need gnawing at him he had no desire to move. The images rolling through his brain disturbed him as much as they aroused him. He could barely understand why he was taking a stand on this, why he felt the way he did. His mother had once told him that he experienced emotions to the fullest. When he hated it was with a fullness and a just hatred, and when he loved, it was with equal passion. Strange that the one who was causing him so much pain was the one who had helped him overcome his hatred to begin with. She wasn't what he had imagined in a woman, she wasn't even what he was normally attracted to. But she was beautiful and for all her stoicism, she couldn't hide her feelings. She was just as afraid of the possibilities as he was. Were they to pursue this beyond the now, to accept that it was more than just a survival mechanism, than they were opening themselves to a world of conflict. It had taken humans centuries to look past race and sex as barriers on their own world, but that prejudice still existed in what they now perceived as alien. When would it stop? When would people be able to look beyond the differences and see the similarities? When would they all see that it wasn't dependent of race, color, species, or even sex, but the ability to love and be loved? The Vulcan's were just as bad. They would frown on T'Pol even more than they already did. It was no wonder she was scared, not that she would admit it. He growled low in his throat as the urge became stronger. Though the need was riding high, he was determined to hold out as long as possible, perhaps then release would offer a greater satisfaction. His head snapped up as the door opened and T'Pol stepped in. The scent of her was enough to make his head swim as arousal nearly drowned him. Anger was his first reaction. "Get the hell out of here unless you want me to finish what I started."

"We need to talk."

His fists clenched as he stood. "We've talked and we understand each other perfectly, now leave." His eyes met hers briefly as he turned off the water. "I need more than you’re offering and you can't give it too me." The next words were nearly spat out. "And I refuse to take it so get the hell out!"

"Cap…" She flinched as he took a step toward her. "You are being illogical."

"I'm human, I'm allowed." Something besides anger broke in his voice and he sagged against the wall. "T'Pol I'm begging you here. My will power is nearly gone and I have no desire to hurt you again. Please leave."

She studied him for a long moment before shaking her head. "I can't." She reached out, taking his hand in one of hers as she stepped closer. The other rested lightly on his chest. She leaned forward, her lips nearly brushing his, the heat from her body overwhelming him. "It is illogical for you to be so stubborn."

He nearly whimpered in protest. "I can't change who I am any more than you can."

With a soft sigh, she leaned against him. "I will not ask it of you, I can not."

"You are more to me than just my first officer, I love you."

As her lips met his she whispered. "I know, Jonathan. I know."

His reaction was instinctive. His arms banded around her waist crushing her to him. He took a moment to savor her against him before turning them both with her once more against the wall. He nudged her mouth open with his tongue and tasted her. "Be sure T'Pol. Be very sure. There is no going back from here." His hands were possessive, urgent yet gentle. "You are mine and are agreeing to that and all it entails."

"I'm sure." Her words were swallowed quickly in the possession of his mouth. Once more his hands skimmed her body, his fingers sliding between her thighs to stroke the sensitive flesh between. Gently he probed her depths, testing her readiness, fighting for control. A soft sound from her caught his attention and he stilled, studying her.

"Am I hurting you? You must be sore."

Her eyes were tightly closed and her lower lip clenched between her teeth. She shook her head no, unable to give him a verbal answer. He continued to watch her, control suddenly settling around him in his need to give to her as well. As his fingers began to move once more she emitted another soft sound. Her expression and the subtle movements of her body left no doubt that it was from pleasure. He smiled then, kissing her once more before following the smooth line of her neck with delicate laps of his tongue and teasing nibbles. The feast continue as he traveled over her collarbone and finally fastened on her breast. Alternating between tender nips and harsh suction, he continue to tease her, shifting from one tender mound to the other. In tandem, his fingers continued to stroke deeper then slower, pausing to tweak the swollen bit of flesh between her thighs. As her legs began to tremble, he removed his hands and settled them on her hips. His mouth captured hers once more and he lifted her, his hands once more guiding her legs around his waist. The need was nearly overwhelming again but he was determined to hold off a bit longer. As one hand moved to cup her bottom in support the other lifted her chin. He waited until her eyes met his and then he slid home in one smooth stroke. He stood there, enjoying the feel of her body pulsing around him. As his hand joined its mate on her bottom, he lapped at her lower lip. "Tell me you love me."

Her eyes were vague with desire. Her tongue flicked out at him, touching him lightly. "Your presence is necessary to me."

"But is it love?"

She arched into him, desperate to feel him move. "Jonathan!"

He moved, drawing out slowly before driving back into her. "Is it love?"

She groaned as he repeated the action, her body clenching and shuddering as he brought a hand around to stroke her where they were joined. Eyes closing, she dropped her forehead to his and groaned again. "Please!"

Once more he repeated the action, the very force of it dragging a gasp, then a whimper from her. "Answer me!"

"Yes! If you must put it in words, the answer is yes!"

The damn inside him broke along with his control and he pounded into her with a passion that bordered on brutal. Each thrust was punctuated with the phrase "love you" as a mantra. His fingers continued to play her until her body climaxed around him. Each clench of her tight sheath a love squeeze forcing him to his own completion. As the last of his essence was drawn from him, he sank to his knees. He kissed her tenderly, holding her close. After several moments he groaned. "I'm getting too old for this." At her confused look he chuckled. "Next time lets take it back to the bed ok?"

He didn't expect her to answer. Instead, he drew her to him once more, kissed her softly then stood and carried her into the bedroom.



Archer lay with his head on her belly. He watched each movement of breath, fascinated. He couldn’t resist stroking his thumb over her navel, marveling at the contrast of his skin with hers. There were no words, not yet. She hadn't even protested when he had carried her from the shower to the bed. He knew he should be concerned with other things, like getting back to the ship, or even with checking on Trip and Hoshi, but he couldn't muster the energy. For the first time since they had come on this away mission he was at peace. He could only hope T'Pol felt the same.

Sighing softly, he savored the feel of her hand in his hair. He thought he might sleep, but then another thought filled his mind. Slowly his hand slid low until it rested above her pubic bone. The slow, sensuous caress of his fingers caused her to shift, and him to smile. He turned just slightly and pressed a kiss to her stomach. "Am I too heavy."

"No."

He smiled again, his fingers tracing over her hip bones and abdominal muscles, only to trail gently over her mons. "There are many things that make us genetically similar." He paused to lap lightly at her navel before continuing. "I didn't protect you in any way."

"While ours is the first relationship of this type, my people and yours did a series of tests on compatibility. Our bodily fluids will not harm one another."

Once more he shifted, this time sucking a tiny bit of skin into his mouth. While the pressure was light, a small greenish bruise formed above her navel. "I'm relieved to hear that, but I was more concerned with potential consequences."

She shifted onto her elbows and waited until he looked up at her. "Consequences?"

A moment passed as he studied her, then he cupped his palm over her lower abdomen again. "A child, T'Pol. Is it possible you could become pregnant?" He could see that he had startled her with that thought.

"I don't know."

"Would it bother you if you were?"

The look in her eyes went from concerned to contemplative in a matter of moments. "Vulcan children are... precious. While I would not wish to bring a mixed child into this world, I would not reject your child." A brief flash of something flickered in her eyes before she spoke again. "Would you?"

The smile that graced his lips was almost whimsical. His fingers resumed their caress of her belly. "I understand your doubts about what a half-breed child would face, but I would not reject it either.” He shifted until he was able to cuddle her under his chin. "I hadn't thought much about being a father, but I find that I wouldn't mind at all," he kissed the top of her head, "especially if you were its mother."

The look on her face was priceless and he slid slowly up her body to kiss her again.  His hands ran in a gentle foray down her body.  Tracing her breasts, he cupped them, teasingly running his thumbs over her nipples.  He smiled against her lips as the peaks tightened at his touch.  Drawing back, he studied her eyes before following the trail of his hands with his mouth.  It was a soft, tender exploration, one of learning and discovery and he cherished every minute of it.

As his mouth closed over her nether lips, T'Pol jumped, but then he was working her with his teeth and tongue and fingers.  When the tremors began, he slid up her body once more, fusing them together as one, the stroke of his tongue mimicking the lazy thrusts of his body; and when they were done, he curled around her, drawing her near, and slept.

~~~~~~

Morning came with a startling suddenness.  The doors to the apartment flew open with a resounding thud as Celestian guards flooded the main room.  The residents were dragged from their beds kicking and cursing, and barely allowed time to cover themselves as they were marched out of the room.  Both Archer and Tucker did their best to keep the guards from handling their mates. After discovering much less cooperative men when the woman were handled, the guards released their hold and encouraged the group on with weaponry. 

Archer felt a tightening in his gut when his team was ushered into the Queen's audience chamber.  Once more he had to fight back the urge to strangle her as Malia entered with a gleeful smile.  The woman actually had the audacity to clap as if they were trained monkeys performing on command.  "Wonderful, absolutely wonderful Jonathan.  That wasn't hard at all and you obviously enjoyed yourselves.  I'm curious about something though."  At his death glare she continued.  "I overheard your conversation about children.  If you two are not physically compatible to breed, why is it you were able to copulate?"

The urge to slap her was nearly overwhelming.  "Tell me something Malia?  What right do you have to manipulate people to do your bidding?  What right do you have to put us in situations that we would normally never face, just to satisfy your curiosity?  You do realize that there are more species out there than you can imagine?  How would you feel if the tables were turned and we ran these little experiments on you?  In fact, I think fair is fair.  You've run this experiment when we have done everything possible to share information with you.  I think perhaps we should be allowed access to four of your people, you among them, so that we can see how your reproductive processes work."

Malia chuckled and clapped her hands once more.  "Bravo Jonathan.  I'm afraid I have to deny your request however.  You see, we needed to know what we faced out there, the things we would encounter.  You were our best choice.  We did nothing but use the situation to our advantage."

"You had me drugged and you can say you did nothing to us?  Commander Tucker and Ensign Sato were at the beginning of a relationship when they came here.  How much damage might have been done because you withheld information?"

She slumped in her chair, looking for all the world like a pouty child.  "You whine over what might have beens when it is obvious that you all have benefited from our interference.  Tell me Jonathan, how long would you have denied your love for T'Pol if we had not interfered?  There is a truth here that you don't want to face."

Fists clenching, he stepped forward.  "There may be an element of truth to what you did, but I will not allow it to justify how you have used us.  You could have cause irreparable harm to all of us.  Most people don't like being forced into something.  What if it had backfired?  What if I had seriously hurt T'Pol? Or worse, killed her in my frenzy?  Did you even consider that?"

Malia stood in a fit of temper.  "I am sovereign here.  How dare you take me to task.  Of course we considered the possibility you might harm her.  That is one of the reasons we were monitoring your behavior.  None of you were harmed."

"No thanks to you.  You know what really pisses me off Malia?  All you had to do was ask.  While we weren't and aren't willing to perform like paid courtesans, we do have media and information at our disposal.  Hell we could have provided you with diagrams and taken the time to explain them and how they worked.  It wouldn't have been the most comfortable conversation, but we would have tried.  Hell I thought we were trying.  I had no idea you were so obsessed with human sexuality that you would harm us.  Your elders were correct to keep you separate from other civilizations.  If cannot treat people with the common courtesy that you would demand, then you have no business interacting with other species."

Glaring at him, Malia approached until they were nose to nose.  "You will cease to take me to task.  I made a decision and you will accept it."

"You're right, I will.  We all will live with this decision you made.  My culture has a word for what you have done to us.  It's called rape, and it is a serious crime.  It is one which violates our most basic rights, the right to choose and the right to say no.  You took those rights away from us."

"Fine fine you were mistreated and so on.  Really...  I gave you something you wanted desperately and received some information in the exchange.  You should be thankful for that at least."

Anger flared even stronger inside him, the force of it burning the edge of his control.  His fingers twitched with the need to tighten around her throat.  He started to move, only to still as a warm hand closed around his fist.  His eyes snapped to T'Pol.

Her gaze was steady and sure as it met his.  "Let it go for now Jonathan.  She cannot see the wrong of it.  Just let it go." 

Something shifted, the anger dissipating in a flare up of the darker desire that had been tugging at him for days.  That in itself was enough to make him want to scream.  He was adult enough to know that it was this woman who was the cause of it.  She was the source of his need, with or without the drugs and he wasn't certain if could do without her, especially now that he knew what he was missing.  Afraid to speak, he nodded and turned from Malia.  Unable to resist, he drew T'Pol to him, enfolding her in a hug and burying his face in her hair.  He stood that way for several moments, drawing strength from her.  When he finally turned back to Malia he was calmer than he had been since she had informed him of this fiasco.  "When do you plan to allow us to return to our ship?"

The young Queen studied them all for a long time, eventually returning to her seat.  Instead of being angry and defeated as he had been earlier, Jonathan Archer seemed calm and confident.  She didn't understand it completely and would have liked to run a few more experiments, but something in his eyes actually made her regretful of her actions.  That brief flash of remorse lasted only a moment, but it was enough.  It reminded her that she had liked and respected him when they had met.  With a sigh, she motioned to her guards.  "Return them to their shuttle.  We have all the information we need."  With an imperious look, she stood and left the room, all the while telling herself it had been for the sake of her people.

~~~~~~~

Jonathan Archer sat in his quarters staring out the view port.  It had been nearly six hours since they had returned to Enterprise.  After an hour in decon, they had all been ushered to sickbay for additional scans.  As Malia had stated, Hoshi had been affected by the Boru only minimally and T'Pol not at all.  He and Trip had taken the brunt of it.  Both men had still had elevated levels of testosterone at the time of the scans, though Archer's was significantly higher due to the injection he had received.  Tucker, Hoshi, and T'Pol had been released with orders to rest.  Archer had been forced to stay behind while the doctor countered the hormones with a hypospray.  He had finally been released to his quarters with orders to rest as well, which he completely ignored.  Starfleet had been notified only that the Celestians had attempted to force them into a study on reproduction, they were not informed of the success of those attempts, and Phlox, bless him, had left it out of his log.  Now though, he was tired, and heartsick.  With each moment that passed he worried about his actions on the planet and how they would affect his future.  He knew that sleep would help, but his heart and mind were troubled.  He wanted to confront T'Pol and yet he was afraid to.  Their lives were back to normal, but what was normal now?  Taking a deep breath, he stood.  Having never been a quitter, he wasn't about to walk away now.  The decision made, he moved to the door, only to stop as the chime sounded.  He tapped the control panel, opening the door.  Before him stood his choice and he couldn't move.

T'Pol was startled by Jonathan's sudden appearance.  She had come to talk to him, but hadn't really expected him to be awake.  Her eyes flicked to his, then away as uncertainty clawed at her.  She drew her logic around her as a shield.  "May I come in?"

He nodded sharply and took a step back, causing her to brush against him as she entered.  His breath stalled in his throat.  The need was there again, fresh and sharp with just her touch.  "I was just coming to see you."  The words were soft, nearly a whisper.

Hers stuttered as she spoke.  "Were you?"  She sat quickly on a chair, unable to stand.

He nodded and turned from her, walking to the window and resting his hands on the sill as he looked out at the stars.  "For as long as I can remember I've only ever wanted one thing.  I wanted to see the stars from a starship.  I wanted to be Captain of that starship and realize my father's dream."  He glanced at her, his mouth tipped in a half smile.  "It sounds like more than one thing, but its all connected to being the Captain.  The stars have always been my constant.  As a child I studied them, certain I would explore them.  As a man, I watch them with the satisfaction of knowing I am doing what I've always dreamed."  He grew silent.  "I had thought to give you an out; to pretend none of this ever happened, and continue as we always had.  I mean... I had been drugged, so I could tell myself it hadn't really been me."  He heard the sharp intake of her breath and turned, startled by the hurt expression that flashed across her face.  He moved in front of her and kneeled in front of her.  His hands closed over hers.  "I would have been lying to myself.  Those words I spoke to you last night were true.  I love you.  Somewhere along the line those stars stopped being what I wanted and needed to make me whole and you took their place.  You are my constant now and I don't want to let you go.  I don't think I can."

She shuddered at both his words and the force of emotion that rolled off of him.  She didn't know what the future held for either of them, or how this choice would affect them, but she did know she couldn't walk away from him.  She leaned forward until her brow touched his.  "I meant what I said as well Jonathan.  You are a part of me and necessary for my existence. I don't think I could let you go either."

A soft chuckle echoed through the room, and then he was standing and pulling her up with him into a fierce hug.  "Will wonders never cease?"

"What?"

"You and I agreeing on something.  First we admit we love each other and then that we intend to do something about it."

"I don't think..." 

He spun her in a short, tight circle.  "Don't think T'Pol."  Setting her on her feet, his hands came up to cup her cheeks and he kissed her gently.  "Make love with me.  I need you."  At her concerned look he laughed again.  "Not sex T'Pol, you.  I crave you as a man craves his mate."  He kissed her again.  "Though you are just as potent as any drug..."

She nodded and wrapped her arms around him.  As they tumbled to the bed, clothes disappeared and hands and mouths explored.  As bodies merged, they were both secure in the knowledge of each other and their choices.

Fin~    

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